On Mondays, I answer questions frequently asked by those considering a return to the Catholic Church. How do I know this stuff? I was away for more than 30 years myself, and am the co-author of When They Come Home: Ways to Welcome Returning Catholics, a book for pastors and parish leaders interested in this ministry.
If being Catholic is so great, how come people seem cold at the parish I tried?
The body is only as good as the sum of its parts, no matter how divinely inspired.
It is true that you’ll find some people who come to Mass only to get their “Catholic card” punched, their weekly obligation, in their mind, taken care of. These people are the ones who won’t move over to let you in the pew, who scowl and ask you to remove your 
child because he or she is disturbing their solitary worship experience, who don’t understand that our faith at its finest and most challenging involves not only worship of God one hour per week, but attempted devotion to him 24/7 in all forms and in interactions with all people. They may include people who actually do some ministry, such as volunteering at a homeless shelter or food pantry or running a parish program or teaching CCD or lecturing or serving as extraordinary ministers. And yes, sometimes they include the ordained.
You will find these people in other churches as well. You’ll also find them in your family or neighborhood and at work.
If you come to Mass with a smile and a “Good morning!” for everyone you encounter and volunteer for a project or two listed on the parish Web site or in the bulletin, you’ll find real and genuine, welcoming people on fire for the Lord. This isn’t to say they’re perfect by any stretch of the imagination. But they try to follow Church teachings and live a Christlike life in the way they spend their time, talent, and treasure.
You will find these people in other churches as well. You’ll also find them in your family or neighborhood or at work.
Which kind of person do you like to be around? Which kind of person are you? There’s something to that pop philosophy that we get back what we put out.
Submit your own questions to returning@melanierigney.com; they may be addressed in a future post. Thanks, and God bless.
