Tomorrow, we hit the halfway point of Simbang Gabi 2012, the nine-day, 5 a.m. Mass cycle the Filipino community at St. Charles Borromeo organizes each year at this time and that I’ve been blessed to be a part of the past six years.
And I’m tired. After tomorrow, it’s all downhill–just four days left–but today I’m tired, even though I’m getting about the same amount of sleep I usually do, just earlier.
There are benefits to being this tired, past cranky, past whiny, I’ve learned. For example:
- I frown and look quizzical less often, because smiling takes less energy.
- Last night, when I unexpectedly ran into someone who was pretty much a jerk to me several years ago, I was too tired to be snide or snarky or angry. Instead, I listened to her story of losing both her parents in short order, and provided genuine compassion.
- Beautiful music or words result in a teariness of appreciation I’m too tired to hold back.
- I’m too tired to get very upset about perceived slights and injuries.
After Simbang Gabi, a family reunion on the West Coast follows, and that will keep my bedtime messed up until January 3 or so. Then I’ll be back to an in-bed at 11 p.m., up at 5:50 a.m. weekday routine.
But I hope I don’t forget what I’ve learned about being tired.
